Here's one starting-point, as recently stated by @michaels-85957 in another discussion elsewhere on Medium, where he is giving an example of a toxic perspective that so few women are willing to own:
"...women bring ALL of the great qualities men do, MINUS their bad qualities, PLUS qualities only women have. Man 2.0, if you will."
Here, @michaels-85957 is summarizing an archetypical perspective held by certain women (the one whom he is citing happens to be a real-life female friend of his) who view themselves as feminists...but are actually, what I refer to as, "neofeminists." In other words, they don't want equality between women and men -- they want a new society that inherently values female superiority (embodying "female exceptionalism") and that teaches men/boys to be deferential to women/girls by default.
Too many women embody/ooze this mindset, but can be hesitant about actually admitting it...the same way too many men are unwilling to view women as their professional equals (when it comes to power-sharing) or true partners amidst heterosexual romance/intercourse.
White Feminist = Neofeminist
(although even the "white feminist" reference can be a bit too general, since plenty of neofeminists are women of color)
Regarding neofeminism, here's where the cognitive dissonance comes in...
As men/boys, according to this neofeminist doctrine, we're usually either "too stoic" or "too fragile." Or, incidentally, sometimes BOTH at the same time!
What's the "happy medium" (if any) between hyperstoicism and hyperfragility? The problem, folks, is that the answer to that is entirely subjective. If I bottle up my emotions (even if out of necessity), apparently I'm adhering to toxic masculinity. If I let my emotions flow freely, I'm supposedly exhibiting "white/male fragility" and "making it all about me."
It's a Lose/Lose proposition with these archetypes. They want to be the new ones calling the shots, in every scenario throughout society, because of vengeance from cultural trauma.
That's somewhat understandable, in theory...until the oppressed becomes the oppressor. Or, until she openly and unapologetically SEEKS TO.
Yes, Sheryl Underwood -- I'm looking at you!
