I don't see where the conflict is. The two dynamics that you seem to reference can -- and should -- go hand-in-hand.

Toxic masculinity as a concept can be replaced by something better or healthier. The problem is that society has failed to coin/frame an antonym to toxic masculinity. So there's a void there.

Then there's the second aspect that you seem to focus on more, in this piece. Modeling behavior. Which has also been sorely lacking, insofar as positive male role models. You seem to be suggesting that men should seek out positive role models (or peers) more proactively, as well as those who are trying to eradicate toxic masculinity should seek out younger men/boys whom they can offer to mentor? If that's what you mean, then I'd agree with that.

However, you can't have one without the other. You can't rail against toxic masculinity without modeling behavior to encourage a healthier alternative. And you can't promote healthy male mentorship without identifying the societally-conditioned "male" traits that are -- and have been -- so toxic in this world.

Power dynamics are also a part of it -- but with context and nuance. When an abuse of power is occurring, it needs to be called out...no matter who the abuser is, or who their target is. It can be in the workplace. It can be at school. It can be in social settings. It can be at home. It can be online. But this can't be viewed strictly along a rigid male/female binary.