That's probably what it is.

What I was trying to say was: In theory, it would be nice if everyone could consider us each to be an "ally" to their cause and having compassion for them -- but it's also an impossible feat, since there are so many different interpretations and definitions of what "allyship" necessitates.

The resignation you were sensing may have been me acknowledging that we can't achieve perfection and we're going to be failures in the eyes of some...but we just have to balance being compassionate with being true to ourselves in the process. If that isn't good enough for cultural gatekeepers, then we just need to shrug and push our way past their rhetoric.

Would something along those lines have clarified my position for you, with better coherence?