This is why I'm so thankful/glad to be gay. I don't know how you guys (heterosexual dudes) do it, sometimes! :-P

The logical common sense response to this (her neofeminist claims) would be: if you choose to make yourself look extra-nice for a date, then you shouldn't expect your date to financially compensate you for that. Otherwise, it stops being a date/courtship, and starts being a business transaction.

Is she dating somebody for his looks, or because she wants to meet (and spend time with) a kind, compatible person? Is she going extra lengths to make herself look good because she just assumes the guy (barely even knowing him) will be shallow, and that he'll be viewing their first date is akin to using an escort service? Because expecting to be paid for, on a date, due to one's aesthetic preparations -- that really cheapens both her as well as her male companion.

If I proactively invite a guy on a date, I'll definitely assume that I'm paying for him (since I initiated the invite). Otherwise, I always go into a date expecting to pay for my own portion (nothing more, nothing less) -- and, if we have chemistry, we can readjust the "who pays?" question on subsequent dates.